by Martin Quigley.
It was lovely to be back with everyone at Thundersley Christian Spiritualist Church. The last time I served the Church was back in March, and this time I wanted to share some thoughts and experiences from my own spiritual journey.
Life is not always easy. Even those of us who work as mediums experience loss, grief, difficult periods and all the other challenges that come with being human. The day before this address marked seven years since the passing of my own mother. It naturally caused me to reflect upon how much life can change and how quickly the years seem to pass.
How Quickly Life Changes
I sometimes compare life to a Catherine wheel. When it is first lit, it begins turning relatively slowly, but then it seems to spin faster and faster. Life can feel much the same. When we are young, the years seem to stretch ahead of us, but as we grow older they appear to pass increasingly quickly.
My mother was 39 when she had me, and because I had three much older sisters, I became conscious from quite a young age that I had an older mum. I always had a fear of losing her. Although I lost my father earlier, I was blessed to have my mum with me until I was in my mid-forties. I remain enormously grateful for those years.
My journey into mediumship has also shown me how unexpectedly life can change. I began as somebody who did not particularly want to stand in front of a camera or a crowd. Yet, after sitting in development circle and meeting some wonderfully encouraging people, I eventually found myself regularly serving Spiritualist churches across the South East and beyond.
Thirteen years later, I genuinely love doing it.
If a shy boy from Stevenage can find himself travelling around churches demonstrating mediumship, it is a reminder that our lives do not necessarily have to remain as they are today. With intention, effort and encouragement, we can sometimes travel much further than we imagined.
Looking After the Mind
One of the things I have been thinking about recently is the importance of the mind.
Within mediumship, we learn to quieten our own thoughts so that we can become receptive to spirit. Sometimes that feels wonderfully natural. At other times, the connection may feel more difficult. Like everything else in life, there are good days and more challenging ones.
Earlier this year, I went through several demonstrations where things did not seem to flow as easily as usual. Rather than simply ignoring it, I began asking myself what might have changed.
I realised I had been working too much. Between my day job, travelling and serving churches, I was not giving myself enough time to stop. I was not meditating regularly and I was not allowing my mind the space it needed.
That realisation led Victoria and me to begin spending time with a Buddhist monk near where we live. We have been attending sessions in meditation, mindfulness and awareness, and I have found the experience fascinating.
Bringing the Mind Back to the Present
One idea particularly stayed with me.
Our physical body can only exist in the present moment.
My body cannot physically return to yesterday, and it cannot travel ahead into next week. Yet my mind can spend enormous amounts of time doing both.
We can continually revisit things that have already happened, or we can spend our time worrying about things that might happen tomorrow. Through mindfulness and meditation, however, we can practise bringing our attention back to where we actually are – the present.
That does not mean ignoring the past or refusing to plan for the future. Both have their place. But there is a balance to be found.
When our thoughts continually pull us away from the present, we can lose sight of the life that is actually happening around us.
Different Faiths, Shared Values
I was born into a Catholic family with Irish parents and grew up looking towards and loving Jesus Christ. I still do.
At the same time, my spiritual journey has given me an appreciation of the many different religious and spiritual traditions found throughout the world. Where we are born inevitably influences the religious traditions we encounter. Someone born in another part of the world may grow up within Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam or another faith.
For me, what ultimately matters is how we live.
Are we good to other people? Do we help others? Do we also take proper care of ourselves?
I sometimes picture death as a door. Whatever religious labels we have used during our earthly lives, each of us must eventually pass through that door as an individual.
That makes me think about the questions that really matter: What did I do with my life? Did I help others, or did I think only about myself?
I believe there has to be a balance. We need to care for other people, but we must also care for ourselves and our own minds.
How Soon Can Spirit Communicate?
One question I have often been asked as a medium is how soon after somebody passes they can communicate from the spirit world.
My experience has taught me that there is no simple answer. Every person and every communication is individual. However, something happened during a recent demonstration that I think is worth sharing.
I was serving a church in the north of Cambridgeshire. Towards the end of the demonstration, I became aware of a lady in spirit. She had a strong personality. I sensed somebody who knew her own mind, wanted things done her way and would fight for what she believed in.
I felt strongly that she was looking for her son.
A gentleman towards the back of the church responded to the information I was giving. I was aware of significant dates in April and May, which he recognised as his mother’s birthday and his own birthday. I also became aware of his sister in spirit, who had passed before their mother.
Then I became aware of a cat. I saw the cat waiting for his mother and had an impression of her bending down to greet it.
As the communication seemed to be drawing to a close, however, the lady became extremely insistent.
The impression I received was essentially: tell him now.
I did not understand what she meant. I could only pass on what I was receiving. I told her son that his mother seemed determined to emphasise something happening “now” or extremely recently.
His response stopped me in my tracks.
He explained that he had made a last-minute decision to attend church that morning. On the journey there, he had spoken to his mum and asked that, if there were any way she could communicate through the medium that day, she should do so. He felt it would give him reassurance about what he believed.
What I had not known was that, shortly before nine o’clock that very morning, he had received a telephone call telling him that his mother had passed away in hospital.
By the time of the demonstration, she had been gone for only a few hours.
For me, it was one of those experiences in mediumship that I will never forget.
Sharing Our Spiritual Experiences
As mediums, we do not necessarily understand everything we receive. Sometimes we may see something, hear something or simply become aware of information without knowing why it matters.
Our responsibility is to communicate that information as clearly as we can and allow the recipient to understand its significance.
Experiences such as the one I have described have shaped my own understanding of spirit. They are personal experiences rather than something I expect everyone else to accept without question, but they are nevertheless an important part of my spiritual journey.
That is also why I believe we should talk about our experiences.
Every one of us follows an individual path. None of us will have exactly the same life, and none of us will experience spirituality in precisely the same way. By sharing what happens to us, however, we allow others to hear different perspectives and perhaps recognise something that resonates with their own experience.
Most importantly, I believe we should remember how blessed we can be.
Our minds sometimes persuade us otherwise. We become caught up in the past, anxious about the future or focused upon everything we think is missing from our lives.
But I believe we are all loved.
Perhaps part of our spiritual journey is learning to recognise that love, to care for our own minds, to be present for the life we have today and, wherever we can, to help the people travelling alongside us.
God bless.
This article is adapted from a Spiritual Address given by Martin Quigley during a Divine Service at Thundersley Christian Spiritualist Church.
